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my heart : so loved and missed
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Born:March 4, 2006
Rapid City
Died:March 21, 2019
I found Zack on-line thru searching for a Sheltie Breeder. I applied for a waiting list, waited several months and finally was able to pick him on 3/4/2006. He was everything I wanted and I was so proud of him and excited for the time he would come to his forever home.
We lived In Chicago , Il at the time. He was flown to me when he was big enough. He was the smallest of the litter and required 2 extra weeks to be ready. I had a box of toys waiting for him. dog spa , in home trainer and dog walkers. We bonded the moment we met.
When he turned 10 months old we noticed he was started to have issues with his back legs. the vet diagnosed him with luxating patella with a bad confirmation in his thighs adding more stress. I ended up taking him to Integrative Pet Center where they worked miracles with animals using both holistic and traditional medicine. He was still growing so this made him hurt more. After a few treatments he was doing much better I always had to wait for him at his sessions and I remember one day they called me to come to the back and pick him up. He was on under-water treadmill and when he saw me his face lit up and he walked faster like he was showing me how well he was doing. I will always remember that smile and look on his face,
He received treatment there for some time. Sadly though I lost my job and could no longer afford the maintenance treatments. I was also having health issues and had to go on disability. During that process Zack stopped walking and for the next 12 years I became his back legs. I was always there and rarely further than 2 feet from him.I honestly loved every moment.
Despite our challenges we had a happy life. We came to Connecticut in 2013. Zack loved to eat .Even as a puppy he used to sneak away from hs litter while they slept and ate any food in the bowl. He loved playing with his toys.A blue Elephant was his fav. He loved micro managing lol. He would scoot across the floor to greet people. He loved to snuggle close and sometimes when I was napping he would tickle my foot with his paw. Id always laugh and say his name.
He was my constant companion.He was always happy and playful despite his back legs. He posed for pics. He never liked me being gone for very long if I was in another room and would bark if I was gone too long. Being his legs he was totally dependent on me but never ever for one sec did I ever consider that a burden. I loved taking care of my BooBear. We were both there for each other .
In Sept 2018 he developed a cystic tumor on his left backside. We were going to have surgery to have it removed but then they discovered running test hes kidneys had been damaged and they couldnt operate. The vet was able to keep the cystic tumor under control with antibiotic injections. He started on Kidney pills and Canine Renal diet. He did really well up until 2 weeks ago. He stopped eating his special diet and would only eat what he wanted. This complicated matters with his kidneys as we tried to fine food he would eat.He wanted what he wanted. Last Weds a week ago he started to stop eating. By Thursday he still drank some water and ate a bit of cheese , still I felt him slipping from me
I didn't think I could ever seek End of life care for him . I couldn't at all imagine thinking or saying this wiould be his last day it would be too unbearable to make this decision. I didn't have too though. Zack let me know it was time and I understood He was passing and nothing was going to stop this. I didn't want him to begin suffering. I played continuous soft, peaceful meditation music for him and petted him often I stayed with him. He was peaceful and loving up until the final moments at the vet where he started deteriorating quickly. I held his paw the entire time and never left his side. Strangely I couldn't stay in the room and see him lifeless but I couldn't bear to leave him either.I Just like I didn't want to take him but afraid he could suffer I was worried of waiting till they could see him .
I feel he know how much I loved him so much and that he had a wonderful life together with me.I was always there for him just like he was always there for me. Id even wake from sound sleep if I thought he needed anything.




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