My sweet Yaga...where do I even begin? I just can't believe that you are gone. Last night was miserable without you cuddled up next to me...knowing that you will never be there again, keeping me warm, purring in my ear...well, let's just say that I miss you more than words can say.
Never has there been a cat with such a sweet disposition as Yaga. Yaga loved everyone he met, and everyone loved him. He had the most soothing purr, and always knew just when to give that extra little bit of love to make you feel better. He took good care of us, and was always our angel through the storm. Whenever there was sadness, he was always there to give us love and affection...now we are sad, but our precious angel isn't here to give us comfort.
When Yaga's kitty sister, Casey Bear, died last March, he immediately stepped up and took over where she left off. He took on all of her kitty duties, including sleeping on mommy's chest at night and joining mommy on the edge of the tub for her long night-time soaks in the bath. He took special care of his kitty sister, Macy, and made sure that she was never alone after Casey Bear's passing. He loved all of his kids dearly, but had an extra special bond with his girl. He knew when it was bedtime, and waited at her door each night for her to get into bed. As soon as she hit the sheets, he was next to her, purring and nudging his sweet little head under her arm. He was so good to her, and she misses his companionship more than words could ever say.
Anyone who knew Yaga knew how proud he was of his "backside." He showed it off to anyone who would look, and just couldn't understand why in the world no one else was as impressed with it as he was. :) As I sit here typing this, I miss him sitting on my feet, keeping them warm as he always did while I worked on the computer. I miss his snoring, his squeaking, and the way that he used to sleep on his back with all four of his feet in the air. I miss the way that he would come running when I opened a can of tuna, and the way that he would wait until I got out of bed every morning to steal my spot...with his head on my pillow like a person.
I knew when I came home that something was very wrong. He did not get up to meet me as he always did, and looked at me with sad, painful eyes when I petted him. When I picked him up, he cried in pain and struggled to get his breath. I knew when I took him to the vet that he would not be coming back home. I don't know how I knew, but I just knew. As I held him and stroked his precious little head, he stared into my eyes with a pleading look as if to say, "Mom, I'm hurting. I waited for you to come home so that we could say good-bye...now let me have peace."
Unbeknownst to us all, Yaga had been fighting a battle in his own body for what is likely to have been some time. He never let us know that anything was wrong. By the time we got to the vet, his heart was failing, and his lungs were filling with fluid. His liver was painfully swollen, he was throwing up and struggling to breathe. I had to make one of the most difficult decisions of my life--there was nothing that could be done to save his life, only prolong his suffering--did I keep him here for my own selfish reasons, or let him be at peace? The vet left me alone with him, and as I petted him and told him how much I loved him, he looked at me with those same pleading eyes. He was struggling to breathe, and was suffering. I knew that I had to let him go...he was too strong to suffer that way. I stayed with him to the end, and cradled his head in my hand as he passed. I hope he knows how much I loved him, and I hope he knows how much I have cherished his love and companionship over the past 12 years. I miss you baby boy...wait for me at the R.Bridge...